#086 - The Life-Changing Magic Of Time Off

Show Notes

When was the last time you came up with an interesting idea? If you’re like many new entrepreneurs, your schedule rarely allows time for your mind to wander off topic.   
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Research shows that some of our most creative inspiration happens when we allow our brains to rest and stop working so hard, which is why co-hosts Lori Vajda and Nola Boea set out to discover how downtime can not only be great for business, it might just help you come up with your next great idea.  

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In This Episode You’ll Learn 

• Why boredom is considered a “seeking” state of mind.
• How mundane tasks and creativity are deeply linked.
• 8 Ways to embrace daydreaming to improve thinking and creativity.

Key points Lori and Nola are sharing in this episode:

(03:15:78) The mindblowing percentage of U.S. employees that don’t use their time off.
(05:20:52) What the research shows is the link between boredom and creativity. 
(07:04.35) Why resisting feel-good distractions and the high we feel from dopamine inducing activities are actually good for our minds
(9:40.70) The eight components that make a trip transformational. 

Resources 
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Transcript

[00:00:00] Lori: When I was a kid growing up, we would drive rather than fly for our vacations. Without electronics to keep us entertained, we were left with our own imaginations. And that often meant are entertainment came in the form of antagonizing each other. And when we grew tired of that, the familiar whiny chorus could be heard coming from the backseat: How much longer? Today, we live in a time in which we rarely give ourselves time to become bored. In fact, all the entertainment we could ever dream of can be found at our fingertips, waiting on our phones our tablets, and even our watches. Yet according to science, it is precisely in those mundane, dare we say bored, moments that curiosity and creativity become linked. Stay tuned friends, because in this episode, we're exploring a life-changing magic of time off.
[00:00:55] Announcer: You're listening to the Sticky Brand Lab podcast, where time strapped professionals, like you learn how to create a business you'd love in as little as three hours a week.

[00:01:06] Nola: "Guard well your spare moments. They're like uncut diamonds. Discard them and their value will never be known. Improve them and they will become the brightest gems in a useful life."

That quote was by Ralph Waldo, Emerson. It's a Lori, what does that quote spark in you?

[00:01:26] Lori: You know, I love this quote and part of the reason I love this is because for me, the topic that we're talking about is curiosity and creativity, I think that from the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed, we are on our phones or on our tablets or on our computer multiple times throughout the day. And for many of us, that's where livelihood comes, right? You work, you have to stay connected. But even in our off time, we do not allow ourselves, and I'm guilty of this, we don't allow ourselves those spare moments to just be. Be present. Be bored, if you will. Be mindful, if you will. So for me, it really calls out how valuable that opportunity is and that when we use it by being on our phones, or electronics, we are, in essence, throwing away some valuable uncut diamonds. What about for you? What does it mean to you?

[00:02:29] Nola: You know what? I actually had to read that twice. The first time I read it, it was through my filter of that old traditional saying about how idle hands are the devil's workshop. That was kind of how I was taught. Never let a spare moment be unused. So always be busy, never be idle. And so it did not compute. And then I read to realize, okay, it's not "USE well, your spare moments," which was my filter. It's "GUARD well your spare moments" so that they're not used. Which is something I've had to really teach myself and practice. And like you said, with electronics, it's easy to think, well, I'm chilling, I'm not busy. But you could still be, like you said, have your attention focused in something that's mindless on screen or something. And I think if you want to be more creative though, you need to let your mind wander. Disengage completely. And in the U.S. especially, when compared to other countries, we really don't do this enough. One study found that 55% of Americans do not use all of their paid time off. And American workers failed to use 768 million days of PTO in 2018. This is time that has already been paid for. Basically, it's time that's coming to American workers. But we value productivity and output and being busy, which means we rarely, if ever just take time to daydream.

[00:04:06] Lori: And that's kind of what led us to, or at least it contributed to the reason we wanted to do this particular episode. You know, with Memorial Day coming up next Monday, traditionally we post a new podcast on Tuesdays, but with Monday being the holiday and the unofficial or semi traditional start of summer, you and I made a big decision. We decided not only to take the weekend off. But to not publish a podcast on the Tuesday following Memorial Day. Which is a first in our two years of doing this. So along with letting listeners know that we weren't going to have the episode next Tuesday, we also wanted to talk about the importance of taking time to nurture yourself. And nurture important relationships.

[00:04:54] Nola: Yes. Whether you've started a new business or you've diversified your career portfolio by working to create multiple streams of income, or you work flex jobs where you either work a traditional job and you work side gigs, or if they're all side gigs, the point is we all need time to relax, renew, and refresh. And you know what? That's actually good for business. Research has shown that when we allow ourselves to become bored, we actually open up creative pathways. And bored may be a misnomer. It's more like when we allow ourselves time, like in nature or to just let our minds not be engaged, it can open us up to get curious and to daydream.

[00:05:39] Lori: Yeah, Maria Popova is a writer and she created BrainPickings, which is now I believe

[00:05:47] Nola: Marginalian.

[00:05:48] Lori: The Marginalian. So she curates content and she shares it, but she put this topic this way: "Build pockets of stillness into your life. Meditate. Go for walks, ride your bike going nowhere in particular. There is a creative purpose to daydreaming, even to boredom. Best ideas come to us when we stop actively trying to coax the muse into manifesting and let the fragments of experience float around our unconscious mind in order to click into new combinations. Without this essential stage of unconscious processing, the entire flow of the creative process is broken."

It's probably one of those reasons why people will talk about being in the shower and having inspiration happen. I know that is definitely for me. We have a dishwasher, but when I'm washing anything in the sink, just that mundane act allows my hands to remain busy and my mind to do kind of that daydreaming. And often ideas come to me. Disconnected, fragmented ideas, all of a sudden coalesce, and I realized where a new way of viewing things is coming. Just because I gave my brain time to not focus on getting something done. Do you ever have experiences like that, Nola?

[00:07:16] Nola: I do. And you're right. It's when I'm just completely mindless and things are just kind of bouncing around in my head subconsciously. And usually those things coalesce on, actually it happens for me on long plane rides, because it's like, you settle in, there's no more movies, you put the book down and you're not sleepy or you can't sleep, but there's nothing to do, except just let your mind wander or just let your eyes glaze over. And I've had plane rides where I've come up with an entire play script. I pulled out a notebook and jotted down business ideas, invention ideas. I mean, it's just because creativity just flows. It has flown on planes. I've rare opportunities to sit in a tub and just lounge. I had a whole novel outline come to me, just because again, just able to relax, disconnect. And some place that I really like to go for, I don't say I go there for inspiration, but it can open up the pathway for an inspiration, is going out into nature. I'm fortunate to live in kind of a rural setting. So when I go out into nature, I study the way the plants grow in the way the bugs crawl and the way the birds sing. It just changes my perspective. I get more cosmic insights about just the way life works and it makes my little problems seem little. My big problems aren't so big anymore. And it's those trips into nature. And also actually combined with different cultures that had me, as you know, interested in providing transformational travel at one point.

[00:08:54] Lori: Yeah. Exactly right. I think it would be fascinating for people to understand why transformational retreats or trips was really something that you were focusing on and hope to focus on more in the future.

[00:09:09] Nola: Sure. And it's not that it's the travel that's the focus really as much as what can happen. So I used to travel a whole lot with my career. And I found that I personally had a lot of transformative paradigm shifts and so did a lot of people that I traveled with. I wanted to know, what is it that causes that paradigm shift? I found studies that were kind of obscure that mostly in doctoral thesis that took place at relatively around the same time, in different parts of the world. And they all tended to draw the same conclusion.

[00:09:45] Lori: Very cool.

[00:09:46] Nola: Yes. So by combining all the research, I basically concluded eight points. There's eight components that would make a trip transformational. I can just tell you what they were.

[00:09:59] Lori: Yeah, I think this is fascinating.

[00:10:02] Nola: The first one is intentions. You've got to be intent on remaining open to what the experience has to teach you. If you go on your trip with intention to have an open mind, then you're going to learn something. If you go with the intent to be entertained, then you're not going to be transformed, trust me.

Oh, not that you can't be entertained on a transformational trip, you can, but second has to do with location. It's best to go to someplace that's completely unfamiliar and preferably out of your comfort zone. So it could be a destination that has a, like a culture that's completely unfamiliar to you or a terrain in nature that's unfamiliar, something that causes you to stretch.

Then there's a confrontation component. I mean, you're going to need to confront either challenges of nature or challenges of culture. I remember the first time I went to a someplace that I didn't speak the language. It was a very fascinating experience. You may have physical challenges if it's going to be more of a rugged adventure kind of thing. And you may also use that time to confront some social or emotional or spiritual challenges. But that's the confrontation component of a transformational trip.

Then it comes reflection. Take specific time to reflect on what it is you're learning and experiencing. That could be a journal that could be a debrief, but you know you're going to set time aside to really reflect and process what's going on.

Connection is the next one. Connecting with people, whether it be the locals in the area, or if you have people in a group, just making those meaningful interactions. the whole point is about meaningful interaction. Again, it's not, I'm here to be entertained, serve me. It's more of, I'm human, you're human let's learn, let's interact. And make it meaningful.

The next one is contribution. Meaning contribute acts of service and kindness. A lot of people think of that as volunteer service, but actually volunteer service sometimes can be a commodity in itself and it has its own set of problems. So you have to be very thoughtful about volunteer service. However, I like to think of it as just contributing small acts of kindness. Small acts of service, wherever you go. And finding other ways that you can contribute, even contributing to the economy. Making sure that the places you frequent and patronize are local people.

[00:12:25] Lori: That brings up a really good point for contribute too. Because if you're in a new culture, you want to be respectful of the cultural norms.

[00:12:34] Nola: Yeah, absolutely. The seventh component of a transformational trip is a resolution. And that is when you literally resolve to make identified changes in your life. So you've had all these experiences, you've come to your epiphanies and now you've decided what it is you need to change.

And that leads to the last component, the eighth component. And that is action. You've already decided what it is you need to change. Action is to write out your action plan. What you're going to do when you get home. Otherwise, if you don't do that, you're going to get home with every intention, but that intention is going to dissipate very quickly. And what you want to do is pull out that action plan and get started right away. And if at all possible, bring somebody into your plan to help you keep accountable.

So the final component is to take the needed action steps upon returning home. So you'll have gone through your trip. You have, you'll have reflected, you'll have confronted some challenges and you will most likely have drawn some conclusions about these are some things I'm going to do differently when I get back to normal life. Well, it's too easy to get back to normal life and just think of those things as a memory and a "one day." But if you go back home and come in your front door and you have that action plan already mapped out and you've already put in place some measure of accountability, you're more likely to take those action steps, to actually make that aha, that epiphany that happened during the trip to turn into true transformation for the long term.

[00:14:13] Lori: You bring up a really good point going someplace that's out of your comfort zone definitely can be transformational. You can also have transformation happen when you're visiting family or friends that you are familiar with because you might gain some insights. You might have an opportunity for deep reflective conversations. That just open up ways of looking at life and the relationship totally different. And that too was very important here because you and I have some vacations coming up and that got us to thinking about, in addition to transformational trips, you can also take trips or time off to celebrate love, life and relationships. And I think for the two of us that is really what these upcoming trips are about. And so you're going to Alaska. Would you be open to sharing anything about kind of the motivation behind that trip?

[00:15:10] Nola: Well, sure. Alaska is actually where I'm from, born and raised. And so I will be going not back to my hometown, but back to this little town that my cousin has lived in, she passed over the, uh, holidays and at the time COVID was in full swing, it was 40 something below zero, and it was just very difficult to make it there. So we are going, in fact, I now realize we'll be there during the solstice. The longest day of the year. Just occurred to me. How apropos. But our family is coming from different directions and we're going to descend in a little town in Alaska and celebrate. It will be a celebration of life and we'll be spreading ashes in a river and singing songs. And my family is actually quite zany. So even though I'm sure we'll have somber moments, when we get together, we're just freaking ridiculous-ly zany. So I'm just grateful to be in such a crazy, goofy family full of love. And I'm very much looking forward to that. And you have a really amazing trip coming as well, right?

[00:16:16] Lori: This is true. So this is a trip to Portugal. My husband and I are going to Portugal. And originally this trip was all planned out. Every detail was planned out. And by detail, I don't mean every minute was planned out, but all of the necessary details were planned out two years ago, the trip was to celebrate my being cancer-free. So it was at the end of my cancer treatment. And COVID happened. Which was great for recovery, terrible for a celebration. Well, the next year we planned it out again, thinking, all right, it was just a delay. We'll celebrate now. And COVID continued. So we didn't get to do the trip. Two years later, we had a, an anniversary, our a wedding anniversary, a relationship anniversary come up in March and I thought, you know what? Let's just celebrate life in general. So the trip, which I'm sure will have some transformational components to it, also weaves in the celebration of love and life and relationships and the importance of it. Because anybody listening to this and, you know, any illness that you can recover from really just tells you how glorious life is. And life is to be celebrated.

[00:17:34] Nola: It's precious.

[00:17:35] Lori: It is precious. And so with that in mind, as we wrap up this segment of this episode, we thought about how life can be messy. Working on a business can be messy. Things come up, things don't go as planned. And it reminded us of a mindful meditation that our guest, Cyndee Rae Lutz had done for us. She had done a special mindful meditation for us for a previous episode on "Say Yes to the Mess." But given the fact that life is messy, unexpected things happen, we thought we could generalize that a little bit broader. And so we're bringing that meditation here for you to help you open up those pathways to creativity, to mindfulness, to embracing chaos and to saying yes to life.

[00:18:25] Nola: And because it's just a short meditation, less than five minutes it's also an opportunity to practice what we've been talking about today. To just be still and just let your mind wander. And just again, let that time of stillness open up the pathways of creativity.

[00:18:45] Cyndee: I love the topic today, which is Say Yes to the Mess. No matter where you are in your endeavor right now, it's bound to get a little messy at some point. You'll question what you're doing, why you're doing it, and maybe even why you should stop. I'm here to teach you a few simple breathing techniques that will help to calm your nervous system. When you approach anything with a calm, nervous system, everything looks better. It helps to keep that negative mind chatter at bay. It shuts out the distractions and the distracting voices that tell you why you can't or shouldn't do something. And it helps you to persevere and maintain your creativity and focus when things get messy. So find a comfortable seat. It can be on a chair, on the floor, you can even lie down if you like.

And begin by closing your eyes. And inhale through the nose and exhale through the nose. Inhale through the nose, exhale through the nose. Focusing on the sound of the breath as it comes in through the nose and it returns out through the nose. Let the breath be your anchor to this present moment. Where there's no fear from the past and no fear of the future. And if your mind begins to wander, simply bring the focus back to the sound of the breath as it moves in and moves out.

And now we'll add a pause to this same breath. So the next time you take an inhale, pause at the top of the inhale and then exhale and pause at the end of the exhale. Inhale, pause. Exhale, pause. Inhale, pause. Exhale, pause. Find your own pace, your own rhythm. Your pace is the best pace. It's the right pace.

Continue inhaling and pausing. And exhale. Pause. You might notice if the breath is slowing down, if the pause is getting longer or if the inhales and exhales are fairly even. Just notice.

And begin returning to a normal breath, just inhaling and exhaling. And notice the stillness. The stillness that you've created within yourself. The stillness around you. And know that you can come back to this stillness any time you like. Now slowly begin to open your eyes.

Thank you so much for participating. Good luck on your adventure.

[00:23:13] Nola: Thank you so much for listening to this episode. We do hope it makes all the difference in you finding ways to spark curiosity and creativity, as well as nurture yourself. So you can create your best and most exciting life. If you found the information shared here today helpful, let us know by posting here where you're listening or on our Facebook page.

[00:23:33] Lori: Not sure how to turn your idea into a profitable side business? Contact us at stickybrandlab.com/contact. We'd be happy to help you.

[00:23:43] Nola: Be sure to come back next Tuesday and every Tuesday for another informative, inspiring and motivating episode. And remember: Action creates results. So tap into your desire to create a business and brand you love by taking 1% action every day. Small steps, big effects.

[OUT-TAKE]

​Nola: Be sure to come back next Tuesday and every Tuesday for another inspor-- inspormative
[00:24:12] Lori: spreading spores all over the place.
[00:24:15] Nola: I just made up a word.